A letter from an Sardar's mother to her son

My dear Jagjit,

I am in a well here and hoping you are also in a well there. I'm writing this letter slowly, because I know you cannot read fast. We don't live where we did when you left home. Your dad read in the newspaper that most accidents happen 20 miles from home, so we moved 20miles. I won't be able to send the address as the last Sardar who stayed here took the house numbers with them for their new house so they would not have to change their address. Hopefully by next week we will be able to take our earlier address plate here, and that our address will remain same too. This place is really nice. It even has a washing machine, situated right above the toilet I'm not sure it works too well. Last week I put in 3 shirts, pulled the chain and haven't seen them since.

The weather here isn't too bad. It rained only twice last week. The First time it rained for 3 days and second time for 4 days. The coat you wanted me to send you, your Aunt said it would be a little too heavy to send in the mail with all the metal buttons, so we cut them off and put them in the pocket.

Your father has another job. He has 500 men under him. He is cutting the grass at the cemetery.

Your sister had a baby this morning. I haven't found out whether it is a girl or a boy, so I don't know whether you are an Aunt or Uncle.

Your uncle, Jetinder fell in the nearby well. Some men tried to pull him out, but he fought them off bravely and drowned. We cremated him and he burned for three days.
Your best friend, Balwinder, is no more. He died trying to fulfill his father's last wishes. His father had wished to be buried in the sea after he died.

And your friend died while in the process of digging a grave for his father. There isn't much more news this time. Nothing much has happened.

Love - Mom.

P.S. Jagjit, I was going to send you some money but by the time I realized, I had already sealed off this letter.

Sardar Strikes Again............. Some Latest Ones

Sardar: My mobile bill how much?
Call centre girl: Sir, just dial 123 to know current bill status
Sardar: Stupid, not CURRENT BILL, my MOBILE BILL.



Sardar built 2 Swimming Pools. And he left one of them unfilled?
When asked him, he said,
"Oye, that’s for those who don’t know Swimming.



Sardar: I think that girl is deaf.
Friend: How do u know?
Sardar: I told I Love her, but she said her chappals are new

Sardar: Miss, Did u call me on my mobile?
Teacher: Me? No, why?
Sardar: Yesterday I saw in my mobile- “1 Miss Call".


Sir: What is difference between Orange and Apple?
Sardar: Color of Orange is orange, but color of Apple is not APPLE.


Sardar in airplane going to Bombay. While its landing he was excited and
shouted: " Bombay ... Bombay "
Air hostess said: "B silent."
Sardar: "Ok. Ombay. Ombay"



Sardar got a sms from his girl friend: "I MISS YOU"
Sardarji replied: "I Mr YOU" !!.


Son: papa, 4+3 kithne hai?
Sardar: ullu ke patthe, gadhe, idiot, naalaayak, besharam, tujhe kuch nahi
aathaa? Jaa andhar se CALCULATOR le ke Aa..

Haste raho…..

LUMS Pakistan outscore Berkeley,Oxford and Yale at WorldMUN 2009

Harvard World Model United Nations (WorldMUN) is the most diverse college-level Model UN conference and the largest outside of North America. Every year 1,650 college students from over 42 countries attend WorldMUN in a different location around the world; past locations include Beijing, China, Belo Horizonte, Brazil, and Sharm el-Sheikh, Egypt. The conference lasts one week in late March and combines committee sessions during the day with nightly social events. The week provides delegates with an amazing way to experience the host country and to learn with students from around the world.

Vision of WorldMUN

07 April, 2009

The Lahore University of Management Sciences (LUMS) team won the “Outstanding Delegation” Award at the Harvard World Model United Nations Conference held from March 22 – 27, 2009 in the Hague, capital of Netherlands. The team comprised of 8 undergraduate students from LUMS sitting in the simulation of various United Nations committees.

The conference was attended by 2200 students from over 150 prestigious universities worldwide including Oxford, London School of Economics, Yale and UC Berkley among others.

Of these, only two delegations were awarded the “Outstanding Delegation” awards on their performance ratio and LUMS, with 6 individual “Outstanding Diplomacy” awards out of 8, was one of them, the other being MUN Society Belgium.

The award marks the fourth continuous victory of the LUMS team at the Harvard WorldMUN Conferences which are organized by Harvard University and held in a different country every year.. The LUMS team bagged the coveted “Outstanding Delegation” Awards in Beijing (2006), Geneva (2007) and Puebla, Mexico (2008) in the previous years, bringing Pakistan to the forefront of the largest and most prestigious student gatherings in the world, year after year.

Another LUMS team comprising of 13 students performed exceptionally at the Model UN Turkey Conference held in Izmir, Turkey from March 9 – 13, 2009 and attended by over 500 students from across the world. Ten out of thirteen students won “Outstanding Diplomacy” Awards and thus securing the only “Outstanding Delegation” Award of that conference. It is noteworthy to mention here that the funds for these trips are raised entirely by the students of the LUMS Model UN Society themselves through organizing the prestigious annual All Pakistan Model United Nations Conference at LUMS which is the largest student gathering in South Asia.

WorldMUN Awards Policy WorldMUN is an experience based on diplomacy, compromise, knowledge, learning and friendship. It is a unique opportunity for university students from around the world to meet each other and discuss issues of international scope and importance. And so, in the spirit of discouraging competitiveness and encouraging cooperation, the individuals that best capture the ‘WorldMUN spirit’ in each committee will be given Diplomacy Awards. These will be the only individual awards granted and the guidelines for giving the awards will be the same as in years past.

Two Outstanding Delegation Awards will be awarded to the two delegations who have best exemplified the ‘WorldMUN spirit’ throughout the week of the conference.

The following are some of the criteria that are used in evaluating delegates:

• Knowledge and representation of the nation’s interests and policies, and of the committee topics;
• Timely submission of quality position papers;
• Ability to work with other delegates;
• Ability to persuade other delegates about the feasibility of a certain solution;
• Ability to develop pragmatic and acceptable solutions to the issues; Skill and effectiveness in caucusing, amendment and resolution writing, and debate;
• Ability to work effectively with other delegates.
  

This information was originally posted @ http://infoxon.blogspot.com/2009/04/pakistan-outscore-berkeleyoxford-and.html, but it inspired me alot that i could not refrain myself to re-post it.

Sardar Jokes

Bomb and Sardars

2 sardaron ko 2 bomb mile,
1st Sardar: chal police ko de k aate hain.
2 sardar: agar koi bomb raaste me phat gaya to?
1st sardar: jhoot bol denge ki 1 hi mila tha

Sardar and Police

Police: Tumhe kal subah 5 baje phaasi di jayegi.
Sardar: Ha Ha Ha Ha!
Police: Kyon hasn rahe ho?
Sardar: Main to uthta hi subha 9 baje hun.


Doctor And Sardar .

Sardar 2 doctor: Mujhe 1 problem hai
Dr: Kya?
Sardar: Baat karte waqt aadmi dikhai nahi deta
Dr: aisa kab hota hai?
Sardar: Phone karte waqt

Sardar and Home

Man: Sardar jee aap ko garmi lagti hai to kya karte ho?
Sardar: AC k paas ja k baith jata hun
Man: Agar phir bhi garmi lage to?
Sardar: To A/C on kar leta hun

The real Sardar

Ek sardar ki chatri me hole tha,
kisine pucha, umbrella me hole kyun?
Sardar bola, Oye baarish ruk jayegi to pata kaise chalega

Sardar and Hitler

Hitler says, "There is no word like IMPOSSIBLE in my dictionary"
Sardar says: Ab bolne se kya faayda? "Jub kharidi thi tab hi check karna tha na"

Sardar and Computer

Sardar: Yaar mujhe 1 hathora or keel chahiye computer k liye.
Sales man: Magar computer me inka kya kaam?
Sardar: Oye yaar mujhe computer me windows lagani hai.

Two Sardars

1st sardar: oye agar neend na aaye to kya kia jaaye?
2nd Sardar: Neend ka intizar karne se achha hai ki banda so hi jaye

1 sardar rail ki patri per so gaya .
1 aadmi ne kaha kya kar rahe ho? Train aayegi to mar jaoge!
Sardar: Mere uper se hawai jahaaz guzar gaya to kuch nahi hua, train kya cheez hai?

Sardar and Practical Exam

In bio practical:
Examiner: Tell me the name of this bird by seeing its legs only?
Sardar: I don't know.
Examiner: You are failed, what's your name?
Sardar: See my legs & tell my name

CEILING FAN‏

A man died and went to heaven.

He saw a huge wall of clocks behind him.

He asked the angel, 'What are all those clocks?'

Angel answered, 'Those are Lie-Clocks. Everyone on Earth has a Lie-Clock. Every time you lie the hands on your clock will move.'

'Oh,' said the man, 'whose clock is that?'

'That's Mohammad Bin Qasim's. The hands have never moved, indicating that he never told a lie.'

'Incredible,' said the man'. And whose clock is that one?'

Angel responded, 'That's Liaquat Ali Khan's. The hands have moved twice, telling us that he told only two lies in his entire life.'

'Where's President Zardari's clock?' asked the man.

'Zardari's clock is in our office. We are using it as a ceiling fan.